Going to China

So all,

I'm going to China for 5 days starting on the 22 of September. I'm really excited to add another stamp and visa to my passport. Even though I'm only going to be there for a week I'm pretty excited. TOmorrow I'm going to spend the day planning my itinerary.

In other news, I have found a place to house my cats. Right now I'm boarding them at a veterinarian office. I couldn't take the sleepless nights anymore. It's hard to wake up at 5:30 every morning, despite what my mother may say....I'm not that ambitious. I swear i'd have to be paid a lot of money to willingly wake up that early and my cats are not really worth my personal health.

I feel horrible because I had to go through all these hoops to find a place to put them. I guess in a way I feel guilty like I'm just pawning them off. I understand how this could look to some people butI just don't feel that I can provide the loving household that they needed. nonetheless, its still hard to deal with other people's reactions to my irresponsibility. Maybe that's what it was, irresponsibility. I really like to think that I'm being responsible by finding someone that can take better care of them than I can rather than neglecting them. Tell me I'm not crazy in thinking this way?

My mom was the one to say I was stupid to get cats in the first place....well not those exact words. Maybe I was. It really opened my eyes though. It has made me realize that I'm not ready to have a pet or children until I'm settled in a home with my husband and what not. Not that I have a husband right now....but that's kinda the idea. I'm not ready to look after something for a LONG time. Live and learn is how it goes.

Ugh, right now my house is a disaster.....I have very little ambition to clean and its starting to drive me insane. I need that show "Clean Sweep" to come and re-decorate my house. Really that's what I need is a clean sweep.

This past week at work has been interesting to say the least. My co-teacher confronted me. She insulted my teaching style (of which she isn't one to talk) saying that it is unacceptable at this school. She sent me a horrible letter that states how I should never speak to her, we are not friends and that if I have something to say I should write it down in the book rather than talk to her in person. Under those working conditions, things might begin to go splendidly I've decided. She says she tells me these things to get me better marks on my monthly evaluations. I say......what the hell do her bloody marks have to do with anything. I've busted my ass off that this school for 6 months, staying late doing work at home etc....and have not once received the monthly bonus. a vast majority of a teacher's grades is based upon the number of students.......how the HELL am I able to control the number of students I have. I believe I will never get the teacher's bonus simply because I have one of the least amount of students. Last month, I had the second highest score for teacher evaluation and I still placed third simply because I don't have the students. I even retained ALL of my students and gained 2!

Another contentious issue between the two of us was changing my students pants when they piss or poop themselves. I don't know about you, but I didn't go to school for 4 years to be a friggin babysitter. I've changed their pants before and it has taken away from the time I spend actually TEACHING my other students. When I got a complaint from co-teacher about doing preparatory work during down time in my classroom I decided that this was unacceptable. She also mentioned in the letter that it was my responsibility to change dirty pants. Go figure, I am not allowed to do work that will benefit my students' learning while they are busy writing in their books, but I am expected to take time out of actual teaching to change a child's underwear? Where is the logic in that? My preparations during class, does not affect my ability to teach. An interpution from a bathroom accident does however. Logic? None.

I told my manager upon discussion of this incident, that under no circumstances would I change another child. I would send them to the office to be dealt with as it was "disturbing and affecting my ability to be a good teacher" which they seemed to be so concerned about. Manager said that it was my responsibility to do it as I was a kindy teacher. I told her that I did not get hired into this school to become a babysitter. As such, she could fire me if she wanted, but I would never change my students again. Later she said that that would be fine. As such, I'm not fired and Possibly am being taken a little more seriously. I'm sick of being treated like a child in this institution....soon I expect we will be given a dress code of giant puppet suits so we can dance around and make the children laugh and giggle. That will keep our enrollment up, the kids will learn nothing, and the school will be happy with the big fat paycheck they receive of which we only see a small percentage.



Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa bitch fest completed.